Useless Meetings

Written by arimi sidek

This is quite trivial, but sometimes I truly wonder how long will a meeting last.

How long can you stand a meeting?

As a chairman, its deadly serious to observe how efficient you are during meeting.

Useless Meeting Cartoon



Actually I don't want you to answer the above questions for me.

It is sufficient to have momentary reflection on this hog time – eater. Especially if you belong to managerial part of workforce, it going to eats up a considerable portion of your life.

Imagine the continuous and monotonous life that you going to face during meetings. Any meetings at all – PIBGs, Schools, Projects, Workplaces, etc..

I am in the workforce for nearly two decades and had attended many useless meetings so far.

Honestly, I think its hard to put specific time line for any meetings. They can last for hours, days, weeks, months, etc., subject to necessity and degree of the seriousness of matters discussed during the meeting.

But not in single session, please.

How long do you thing human attention span is? Its an oxymoron to think that member of meeting can listen to chairman's mambo jumbo for 4 or 5 hours non stop.

If you still remember, that is why in school, session breaks into several sub-sessions known as “period”, 35 – 40 minutes each. Partly this is to address attention span problem among students.

Unless you practice sufi kind of exercises, yoga, samadhi or the like, you are likely to experience “ghaflah”. That is, among other, short attention span. Just try to focus in your solat [in case you are Muslim] and then realize how short attention span can be. You mind is truly like wild beast that wandering around wherever and whenever it likes. Just matters of seconds after “takbir ratul ihram” you mind already gone else where.

I believe the success of the meeting lies mainly on the the person who lead the session.

But in most meetings, I notice that the real culprit is also the chairman. I have seen many kapurt chairman that are truly oxymorons. The older they are, the more stupid they became. I wonder how the proverb “wisdom begin at forty” come about.

Most of the older chairmen are like antic collectors that trapped in time zone. Often, they spoken their mind off and what come out just like shit.

They only capable of talking about socio-politics, economics and management ideas of 70s and 80s, because that is the only knowledge that they have. They gathered these knowledge long time ago in 70s, in 80s, while study in the university and do not bother to add more as part of the thinking process and thinking dynamics.

Some chair persons think they are so good because they are the head of department and thus, chairing the meeting at the same time.

They think they know more than others. As their ego is so big, it explodes shortly after the meeting begin. Quite often I saw chairmans that “syok sendiri”. They really, really keen on talking off topic subjects and getting lost in the meeting.

Simply put, many of them have terrible time management.

Their time management is so terrible that, if there is a chairman that truly time conscious, that is considered good enough. Others, I think must have some thing to do with their personal thing if suddenly they become time conscious sort.

Such as, picking up their school kid at 12 noon...

I seldom encounter meeting chair persons that capable to hold correct argument with others the meeting. Correct arguments include fairly good art of reasoning, logic and sufficient knowledge on the subject that was discussed.

During meeting, most chairmen just come to know about the matters as written on the minute of meeting per se. These retardos do not even care to read the minute prior to the meeting. In several occasions, they just realize that they brought wrong meeting file and wrong meeting minute 15 minutes after the meeting started.

If you are among those chair persons, please, take long holiday or simply opt for early retirement. Remember, we have passed new millennium eight years ago. Now it is about radical knowledge explosion since the Internet emerges as knowledge super highway, huge source of knowledge.

The younger generation read more nowadays.

They mind are more exposed and hence, tend to know more.

If these old frogs still insist to live under coconut shell, at the very least, they have to accept the fact that they are of ridicule and mockery subject wherever they go.